Queen of the Races
| July 17, 2012 | Posted by Emily under Uncategorized |
Last week, I sent out this tweet:
My feed was immediately flooded with a whole lot of retweets and a slew of:
“AMEN!”
“+1,000”
“Hot damn, Sweaty Em, you are ALWAYS right!”
…Okay, the last one might be a SLIGHT exaggeration, but if you’ve ever had the pleasure of dating me, being my friend, or sharing the same last name, you know it’s true.
Anyway, RACE DIRECTORS, TAKE NOTE: THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN. ALL SATURDAY RACES ALL THE TIME.
As I happily fantasized about a world in which Sunday marathons are a thing of the past and every Saturday is a 26.2 mile party, followed by a marathon celebration of drinks and dancing, I got to thinking about what else would mesh perfectly with my fantasy world of races.
And so I made a list. For the day when I am appointed Queen of Endurance Racing. (PS can we work on making this an actual job? Because I think…scratch that, I know, I would rock it.)
1. Saturday races
Obviously.
Rather than spending entire weekends stressing about upcoming races and eating every carb in sight, why not get the racing out of the way bright and early Saturday morning, AND THEN eat (and drink) every carb in sight.
This tweet was originally prompted by the realization that I might be proceeding immediately from my next PR marathon attempt to the airport. Where is the fun in that? If I’m going to run hard for 26.2 miles, you’d better believe I want to spend at least as long as I was out on the course celebrating my effort.
2. Pint glass bling
Screw medals, give me something I can use for a purpose other than overloading my already full doorknob with more useless neckwear, especially if that something will hold my celebratory post-race craft brew.
The best race SWAG I’ve ever received was at the end of the Umstead Marathon.
Each runner was handed a pint glass as they crossed the finish line, etched with the race logo and holding a folded piece of paper with MapQuest directions to a nearby brewery, ready to fill the bunch of race pint glasses with cold beer as runners trickled in to start refueling and celebrating.
3. A course built for a spectating party
I am sick of encouraging (/forcing) friends and family to travel to cheer me on at races, only to have them wait for four hours in the same spot, and then maybe miss me completely as I run by in a blur of hot pink for 17 seconds.
(cough cough BOSTON cough cough)
The best races that I’ve spectated (Houston) or run in (Vermont) have conveniently looped around the city hosting the race, making it easy for race cheerleaders to dart from spot to spot, catching their runners numerous times.
As a spectator, it’s thrilling to be able to see your BFFs (like Amy and Meb, obviously) run by 8-12 times, and as a runner, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve kept myself running strong by counting down the miles until I see a familiar face again. The more times I see my peeps=the faster I run.
Especially when they reject my hugs and tell me to RUN FASTER
4. Out and back sections of the course
When I register for a race with friends, I want to experience the event with them. Bumping into people at the start line is fun and all, but the day is so much more enjoyable, when race courses contain out and backs that allow you to spot your running friends and give them a little hoot and fist bump.
5. Gender specific race shirts
Ladies: can I get an “AMEN?”
I have one cotton shirt that’s so hideously oversized, that I’ve been able to loan it to my male running partner when he needed a change in clothes after a particularly sweaty run.
Less potato sack, more fitted. That’s all we ask, RDs.
6. Finish line party
And I’m not talking soggy cardboard boxes of pizza atop folding tables with one drink ticket worth of crappy light beer. I’m talking party party. Full on music, dancing, beer, a soiree so irresistible, every racer wants to take part.
Grandmas Marathon did this oh-so-right by setting up hours of live band music in a tent by the finish line that stretched well into the early AM hours. (Also, they put on a Saturday marathon. Sense a theme of success here?)
7. Freezer pops on the course, watermelon and chocolate donut holes at the finish line.
Screw pizza. Forget gu. There is major room for improvement when it comes to course side snacks and finish line refreshments. Let’s start with freezer pops, watermelon and chocolate donut holes.
Feel free to offer your own suggestions. I hear the queen is a fan of snacks.
8. DJs at every mile
The premise behind events like the Rock N Roll series is solid, but from my experience, it’s consistently poor in execution. Every time I’ve run one of their races, I’ve used my own music to ensure my race is fueled by the likes of Rihanna and Eminem, not some garage band that kind of sort of definitely sounds like shit.
When my brother and I ran VCM this year, we would pump a little “Call Me Maybe” whenever we were in need of a push from Carly Rae. People LOVED it. Other runners would slow down or sprint ahead to join our Top 40 mid-race dance party.
When I am Queen, I will have DJs every mile, or even every half mile, since my kingdom is clearly going to be a nonstop running party, motivating runners with the jams that get your legs excited. You know, like straight up pop and 80s power ballads, and maybe a country song or five.
YOUR TURN. What would YOU do if you were Queen (or King) of the races? Keep in mind this is completely hypothetical because I’ve already called dibs on the job. But don’t worry, I’ll hold Open Office Hours and get your input on the reg.
Nice all around! I have to agree – especially with Saturdays. And Freezer Pops. And music.
My biggest peeve is when they have all of the handouts (food, medals) approximately 2 feet from the finish so you are crowded and you cannot cross the finish line with a great photo or great speed as you may ram someone. I don’t mind walking 10 more steps to get that medal I will put in my closet and never look at again.
Please, please, please become a race director, pronto! Thank you.
First, I share the last name but you can’t always be right because I am always right. Perhaps you are right when you aren’t with me. Totally agree Vermont is the best ever marathon for seeing your racer or spectators cheering you on. And that picture of Aunt Julie is the best ever spectator picture. I agree on the watermelon but I didn’t try the freezer pops. Obviously an error. If I was Queen I would plan triathlons with a 400 yard swim at the most and then on to the bike and run! I would allow anyone over 50 to have help getting off their wet suits. I would subtract time for anyone racing with a recently broken wrist and that person would have a special finisher’s medal at the end.
awesome!
Last summer race I did the volunteers gave out freezing cold soaked sponges…brilliant on a hot day.
Virtual race kits – I don’t need a million flyers that I just don’t look at anyway.
Encourage more early start times for slower runners..no one wants to have the clean up crew right on your ass.
I would vote you for queen of endurance racing! :) I have specifically signed up for races because they were on Saturday, not Sunday. Especially triathlons. What’s up with that, USAT? Coming into work double tired from racing + hangover on Mondays suck!
Love this, E! Since NYC is on a Sunday, I take the next day off just in case…by this I mean I did it last year and HECK YEA I’m doing it this year! Free massages! Free smoothies! Free medal engraving! However, this could all be done on a Sunday. The only light at the end of the tunnel is that election day is the following Tuesday, so I run a marathon Sunday, take of Monday, come back Tuesday to no students and sit in meetings with limited movement/running into students and tripping over chairs. This could all by avoided with a Saturday marathon, Marathon Sunday, day off Monday, and easy election day Tuesday. I back you, E, for race director president! (Bloomberg may have a few things to say about this…)
What would be amazing is VCM on a Saturday with VT beers (a mini brewfest!) at the finish instead of the lame michelob they had this year. I ran the Stowe 8 miler this past weekend, and the table of unlimited smuttynose and tent of ice cream was a pretty good race party for a short race.
omg, be still my heart. DREAM RACE. Vermont did have shocktop at the finish too, which was better than the mich. Still not delicious Vermont beer, but a step in the right direction. I was so bummed that Stowe 8 Miler was not the same weekend as brewfest this year. Usually I like to combine the two. Glad you got to enjoy the beer and ice cream!
I would have way more bathrooms. Like bathrooms everywhere! The whole starting area is a bathroom! No, that would be gross, but you get the idea. And toilet paper galore!
If they are on Saturdays, they should also have race-morning check-in. Those of us who travel for races and can’t leave work early on Friday… usually check in Saturday, race Sunday… and then have to do our drinking between race recovery and plane flight/train ride. Saturday morning race + same-day checkin would be the best.
#4 is something that Baltimore Marathon does well.
This list ROCKS and is SO SO SO SO SO SO TRUE! I have been saying that Saturday nonsense for FOREVER, I pretty much only sign up for races that are on Saturdays. Also, if you’re going to give me a free beer, can it please NOT be Michelob Ultra? (cough cough, RNR cough cough). Seriously. Give me the quality stuff. Finally, no more white race shirts.
I am so all about the Saturdays and women’s t-shirts. I can’t use the crazy men’s ones most times. I love your pint glass that is so cute. One of my favorite races handy out candy at the the food stops (hello sweet tooth).
Well, move to Wyoming/Utah as all runs here seem to be on Saturday, as Mormons do not do recreational activities on Sunday, so if you hold a race then, only about 5% of the community will show up. Everything else I agree about. I might even add beer stops along the route, however reading about that guy who ran the BEER half marathon, I probably would limit to 1 or 2 stops.
http://exercisingwhileintoxicated.wordpress.com/2010/07/26/the-beer-every-mile-sf-half-marathon-13-beers-in-13-miles/
Heck yes Emily! I agree with all of the above!
Great post!
I agree 100% with this post. I also agree with Kat’s comment about the finisher chute being longer so that it doesn’t get backed up with people stopping.
I support Emily Halnon as Endurance Queen!
Aw I am the only one who loves Sunday races! I always feel so tired and wound up trying to wake up early on a Saturday morning. I feel ya on ALL OTHER ITEMS however esp the race music.
Here here, Your highness!
I KNEW there had to be a race that gave out pint glasses and a free fill-up! Yes! Thank you for posting!
Great post! You are already a queen to us half marathoners. BTW, I loved your last post since you and I have very similar names – I was Sarah Emily until I got married and shuffled the maiden name to the middle.
As queen can you also sort out of some of the congestion at the beginning of races. Houston also seemed to have this pretty well figured out, but dodging around walkers with headphones the first 1/4 mile is really annoying at some of the smaller races!
I would also like to ask that RD’s just decide on a registration fee and go with it! Several races offering price hikes as the race gets closer and then offering a GROUPON deal to get it for half price.. less than I paid months/weeks ago! Humph!
I’ll back you to in exchange for Saturday races. I just don’t get the Sunday thing!!! For me, it’s a church thing. I love going to church, I don’t want to miss it…but that severely limits the races I sign up for!!
The other thing that annoys me is no mile markers…I did a 10k in December with no mile marker until mile 4. I felt like I was nearly finished, I was so disheartened.
And also, I would like to choose between medals and t-shirts. I’d always pick a medal but understand some don’t want to!
Agreed! And, I dont know if you ever find your way in the Central NY area the second week of July, but there is a 15k that might be right up your alley… the Utica Boilermaker. Pint glasses instead of medals. DJ’s/radio stations at every mile. Popsicles, freeze pops, donuts handed out ALONG the course. oh, and it ends at the Saranac Brewery – free beer for all!
“I’ve used my own music to ensure my race is fueled by the likes of Rihanna and Eminem, not some garage band that kind of sort of definitely sounds like shit”…. i never comment I usually just always read and you have me either dying laughing or in tears…no there is no in between…and I totally agree with this staement so much that I had to comment
AMEN!
I <3 this post almost as much as I hate using <3s to describe my love. Also, races should have complimentary iced tea and gummy bears at the end. Sour peaches are acceptable too.
Portal potties w/o waiting lines and toilet paper, packet pick up right before the race, no crowded first mile and never sold out races :-)
Great list and I’d agree with everything. Mind you, the only downside of racing Saturday morning is that it is normally the only day I get to sleep in (although with Marathon training underway in these temperatures I’m on the road running by 7am now anyway).
I’d also add packet pickup for a few days beforehand at a convenient location that does not require $10 or more for parking or packet pick up on the day if you are flying in.
If you’re doing out and back, don’t make it the narrowest part of the course or at the bottom or top of a hill – noone wants to squeeze up or down a hill only to get to the top and then turn around and come back down again.
Out of curiosity how do you pump Carly when running and make everyone want to join in? Surely the tinny sound coming out of an earbud is really irritating or do you start an impromptu karaoke session?